So you might be thinking, why on earth is the usually upbeat Coco talking about death?
Well the truth of the matter is this Easter we had a wake up call and as I record this podcast my own parents are fine but someone very dear to me is in intensive care. I feel powerless and I was wondering about the children of this amazing woman and how their employers would help them to cope should she not make it through. It got me thinking about how we cope with grief in other cultures and I felt the urge to share this with you – not on the first Monday of the month as I promised you just a couple of weeks ago but on the second Monday of the month.
Grief takes a toll on your performance, mine too, it affects your ability to get things done because as well as dealing with your own emotions we want to be strong for our children, partners and clients, but we cannot do everything and so my dear and valued listeners I hope that you will be flexible and empathetic with me.
There are lots of resources and tips on the webpage for this show so that you can go back to it should you need it, because death is inevitable but it is also impossible – or seemingly so until you start taking care of yourself, until you start meeting people, until you find someone to talk to and if that person is a professional rather than a friend or family member, someone that you do not feel guilty talking to again and again about your grief, then so be it.
Grief is the toughest emotion of all and I wish that I could bear you all of this misery but ultimately we all lose someone we love in life and as we get older we have to face grief more often. Grief is hard, some people find it difficult to talk about their emotions, I get that, it is not always easy, especially if it stirs up emotions of your own. My request to you as a team member, leader or employer is to be kind and considerate to those who are grappling with their emotions during a phase of grief. Likewise, should you have to face grief yourself, be kind and patient with yourself too, take care of yourself and confront those thoughts and feelings – you don’t need to feel lonely, as you face your new reality of life after losing a loved one, there is no need for embarrassment, this is a difficult journey, so treat this as a life experience, an opportunity to help, to make a difference, to make someone feel able to talk about their true feelings, even if they do breakdown emotionally, that’s natural and if we give each other the freedom to grieve as they wish on their own schedule, the chances are that they will recover faster because they are embracing their grief rather than trying to ignore it.